bleh

my skin hates me right now -_-

…I am proud of myself??

Saturday night was my granmother’s 80th birthday, the whole family was invited. Including myself, with one exception - I was told ”you come as a boy or not at all!”

Now, I argued to the hilt that this simply wasn’t going to happen, if nothing else on principle. They have all known now for over a year that I am trans* and if they couldn’t accept it then I couldn’t accept them. Now, I was traveling down with my dad whom has never accepted it and has only ever called me Chloe once, and that was because I had fallen out with him and he said it sarcastically thinking that it would get me off his back.

Three days before her party, I had another fall out with my father, and he screamed down the phone at me ”SUIT YOURSELF! Be selfish, don’t bother coming!” Because I told him, that I wasn’t spending the night in a house full of people who were going to use the wrong pronouns and call me by my old name. 

On Saturday morning my father calls me, and asks if I will come, again. I said to him only on my grounds, I heard in his voice that he was not happy about it and I got a little upset, I knew if I went then I was going to get some sort of shit from my family and if I didn’t go I was still going to get some sort of shit for not going. So I called my mother and asked her what I should do. She said that if I go, I go as Chloe and I stand my ground and she called my father, to whom said that I could go as Chloe - and warned me of how people might react - but I have to dress down a bit. So that is exactly what I did. 

When I got there my Aunt E. asked me what I would like to be called and I said Chloe, she then proceeded to introduce me to everyone as Chloe including my grandfather - who did take issue and gave both myself and my Aunt E. a lecture, however I stood my ground and delt with some shit before most people actually spoke to me about it and came round.

I am so exceedingly proud of myself, noone ever stands up to my family, especially not my gran-parents and I did it! Further from this, I think it gave other people the courage to do so aswell! My Cousin K came down with her girlfriend and couldn’t have had a better time of it. 

I was anxious all the way there, and on the night but all in all it went quite well. 

(There was only one downer, this was when my cousin accused me of coming on to my step-cousin, which was not the case - I fell asleep cuddling him! So I drank myself into oblivion and had a fit in the bathroom! I then proceeded to vomit all over myself and go to bed lol heh) 

#acceptance  #anxiety  #bullying  #family  #lgbt  #mtf  #myself  #of  #proud  #trans  #trans*  #transgender  #personal  

Sometimes,

I find it quite hard to understand the Americans and there social norms and interactions, today I seen on milkboys a post called ”Shock! Horror! Equality!”, now my issue was not with the milkboys but the people whom were in the documentary that the milkboys were discussing. Please I beg that you go onto it and have a look because it is simply disgusting and the argument seems very confused between -so called- morals and the politics in America.

I had intended to write a huge piece on this, however it shall have to wait untill later (as I am baking a cake and it needs me more than tumblr right now, nothing needs me more than tumblr.) Though I would be interested in peoples’ opinions on the subject!

#LGBT  #equality  #gay marriage  #etc.  #America